WOW! If anything ever makes you feel like you were not thinking straight this experience did just that. Although no matter how many times we go through it in our minds we just cannot seem to find where we would have saved any time knowing what we knew then. Taking into account what we know now, that is a different story. Confused, so was I and I still am.

So I will take you back to the beginning.

The Mom woke me up at about 6:00 AM and informed me that she was contracting. No more details than that. She then said that she would take a shower. I continued to sleep for a few minutes then decided that I had better get up and gather everything together. We were packed and ready except for a few things and I quickly had those together.

We had made arrangements for some friends to watch the kids but decided that we needed to have someone closer so I called a family that lives in the same complex as us and they luckily saw the call and quickly returned it. They agreed to watch Roo and Ren.

After the shower The Mom wanted me to start timing the contractions. Despite having 2 children already we have never experienced contractions prior to being at the hospital so I had to ask The Mom what we were looking for in timing them. She advised me and we began the timing. They were lasting for 30 seconds and were about one and a half minutes apart. The Mom was sure there was something we were missing so she wanted me to call others that are experienced in the way of contractions for some advice. I called a few people and the advice was simply that does not sound normal call you doctor. I began to call and was listening to the prompts when The Mom yelled, “hang-up, we are going to the hospital”.

I promptly hung up the phone and took the kids down stairs to get into the car. I took the bags down and helped The Mom down and into the car. We dropped the kids off and headed to the hospital. At the first light we were stopped and so I asked The Mom if she wanted me to run it, she said no so I waited for a green and continued on.

The Mom began doing the audible pain, cry, emotional thing that only a women in labor can muster and I knew we were past the 5 or 6 hours of waiting in the hospital before labor began. I excellerated slightly and noticed that even after a slight exceleration I was very close to 100 MPH. After exiting the freeway we were again stopped at a red light. After asking The Mom if she needed me to run it and having her tell me no I felt we were farther from delivery then I had previously imagined. However the no quickly became a “YES” and I pulled out from behind the car in front of us and safely speed through the light. At the next turn The Mom advised me that her water had just broken. The only thing I could thing of was why did we not sit her on towels. KIDDING! I again speed up and noticed that I had exceeded the speed limit of 40 MPH by more than 60 MPH.

The Mom then informed me that she was pushing and again I was not too worried as the fastest she had accomplished a deliver at the pushing stage was 45 minutes. The decibel level in the car increased slightly as I pulled into the area she had taken me to the previous week and Identified as the delivery center. I exited the vehicle to go in and get help and the doors were locked. Needless to say The Mom was not sure where we were to go and our lame attempt at a dry run the week earlier was a failure. Not knowing where we were supposed to be I headed to the emergency room.

I stopped at the first door under the canopy and ran inside. At the desk I told the receptionist that my wife was delivering a baby in the car. I was exaggerating so that I could get help quickly. She advised me that I would need to pull into the next bay (about 25 feet ahead) and that help would be there. This entire exchange took less than one minute and I was back out to the van with The Mom.

When I arrived outside again the passenger side door was open and a security guard was standing next to The Mom. I approached and when I got there I saw the baby laying on the front seat of the van as The Mom supported herself with her arms so as not to sit on the baby. The Security guard advised me again that I needed to pull forward and I did.

I then ran out of the car and over to The Mom and the baby. The Mom quietly stated that the baby was not breathing. I placed my hand under the baby’s chest and elevated the head with my forearm. I was rubbing the chest and the baby began to cry. It was obvious that The Mom was relieved, as was I. A doctor then arrived and questioned how they were going to get the baby and The Mom our of the vehicle. One of the nurses stated that when this happened before they cut the cord and separated the baby there in the car. I looked up to see who it was and noticed that no fewer than 30 doctors, nurses, tech.’s etc. , maybe more, had gathered around the car. They were trying to get The Mom repositioned and reclined the seat. They were trying to get her out but her shorts were still around her knees. She was yelling at them that her shoes were still on and they ignored her trying to pull the shorts off. Being wedged between the door and the doctor that was holding the baby I reached around and removed her shoe and slid her shorts off.

At that point I got out from behind the doctor and was leaning on the hood watching the whole thing. They cut the cord and took the baby inside. They then helped The Mom out of the car and took her inside. I was told to move the van forward and and they would bring out some towels to clean up a bit. I moved and they returned with the towels. I took them both and just sort of gathered all i could into them and handed them back. I then took the van and parked it and ran back to the guard who took me to The Mom and the baby. At this point, about 10 to 15 minutes later, I am still referring to the baby as the baby because I still do not know what we have. On my way to the room I asked the guard if he knew and he did not, when we entered the room he stated that the father would like to know the gender of the baby. The nurses and doctor just kind of looked at each other as if to say “surely one of you noticed”. Finally some stated it was a girl. Another nurse then asked what time the baby was born to which there was nothing but silence. The Mom then piped up and said she looked at the clock in the van and remembers seeing 7:54 AM. So that was the time she was officially born.

The Mom was then wheeled to labor and delivery and it was at this point I took the first picture of the The Mom and Fish. We entered the labor and delivery unit and were there for only about 30 minutes to an hour as they delivered the placenta and cleaned everything up. We were informed that the weight had not been taken yet nor were there any measurements as far as size. We were also informed, to our dismay, that because the baby was born outside the hospital she would not be allowed in the nursery. This was disappointing because the only reason we chose this hospital was because it had a nursery.

After everything was complete there I left to call the Mom’s and let them know. When I returned we were taken to the maternity ward and placed in only one of four rooms that have there own shower. I only mention that as it seemed kind of strange that the maternity ward only has four rooms with private showers.

Fish still had not been bathed and she stunk. The Mom and I took turns holding her until she was finally bathed after a few hours of waiting. We had to wait a lot over the next day and half as all the tests and other common procedures had to be done in our room. All the equipment to perform the procedures had to be moved into our room from the nursery and the necessary personnel gathered. It just seemed so labored to get even the simplest thing accomplished.

That is it. Sounds a little like 1807 in a horse drawn carriage rather than a van and we still find it hard to believe. In fact as time passes and we retell the story it sounds even more unbelievable. I am sorry if this bored you and if you received more information that you wanted, but you chose to keep reading.

For some pictures of the birthing place click here. These, I am told, are not for the faint of heart.